Getting the Timing Right

Afternoon tea is not simply a late lunch, nor is it a substitute for dinner. Traditional afternoon tea sits comfortably between three and five o'clock, a small meal designed to bridge the gap between luncheon and a fashionably late supper. The habit is said to have begun with the seventh Duchess of Bedford, who found herself peckish at around four o'clock and asked for a tray of tea, bread and butter and cake to be brought to her room. Her friends copied her, and a national ritual was born.

For hosting at home, a four o'clock start is the sweet spot. It gives you a clear morning for baking, an unhurried early afternoon for setting the table, and enough daylight afterwards for guests to linger without the pressure of a looming dinner. Allow a good two hours for the tea itself. This is not a meal to be rushed, and guests should never feel that the plates are being cleared from under them. If you are feeding people who will not eat again until eight, add a little more substance to the savoury plate.

Laying the Table

The table should look generous rather than formal. A crisp linen cloth, your best china, and a small vase of garden flowers will do more than any amount of silver. If you own a three-tiered cake stand, use it; if not, a collection of pretty plates and a couple of low stands works just as well.

• Tea — offer two or three choices. An English Breakfast or Assam for those who take milk, an Earl Grey for the fragrantly inclined, and perhaps a light Darjeeling or a green tea for the purists.
• Teapot — warm it first with hot water, then brew loose leaves for three to four minutes. A second pot, kept topped up with hot water, saves endless trips to the kettle.
• Milk and lemon — jugs of both, plus a bowl of sugar lumps and a pair of tongs.
• Napkins — cloth, folded loosely on the lap rather than tucked into a collar.

A teapot cosy is not an affectation; it keeps the second and third cups drinkable. Set a small jug of hot water alongside so guests can weaken a strong brew to their own taste.

The Savoury Course: Finger Sandwiches Done Properly

Sandwiches are where good afternoon teas are won or lost. They must be delicate enough to eat in two bites and generous enough to taste of something. Use thin-sliced white or light brown bread, butter it to the very edges to stop the filling making the bread soggy, and cut the crusts off cleanly with a sharp serrated knife.

• Cucumber — slice thinly, salt the slices for ten minutes, then pat them dry. This small step is the difference between a crisp sandwich and a damp one.
• Smoked salmon — with a scrape of cream cheese, a squeeze of lemon and a little dill.
• Egg mayonnaise — lightly bound, seasoned well, finished with a few cress leaves.
• Ham and mustard — good cooked ham, a thin slick of English mustard, nothing more.

Cut each sandwich into neat fingers or triangles and arrange them on the bottom tier of the stand or on a large platter. Aim for three or four pieces per guest, and keep a spare plate covered in the kitchen for refills.

Scones, Fresh from the Oven

The scones should come out of the oven within an hour of your guests arriving. Warm scones, split and spread, are the heart of the whole affair. A straightforward recipe will serve you well: 225g self-raising flour, a pinch of salt, 55g cold butter rubbed in until the mixture looks like fine breadcrumbs, a tablespoon of caster sugar, and around 150ml of milk to bring it together. Roll to about 2cm thick, cut with a fluted cutter, and bake at 200°C (fan 180°C) for twelve to fifteen minutes until risen and golden.

Serve them in a napkin-lined basket with a bowl of clotted cream and a pot of good strawberry or raspberry jam. On the jam first or cream first question, you may take either side, but be consistent and be prepared to defend it. Do not be tempted to butter a scone before adding cream and jam; that is a step too far for most tables.

Cakes and the Sweet Finish

The top tier is for the small and the pretty. A light Victoria sponge, a lemon drizzle cut into modest squares, a few fruit tartlets, and perhaps a shortbread or two will complete the stand without overwhelming anyone. Two or three varieties are ample. The point is variety and restraint, not plenty.

If you are baking ahead, plain sponges and biscuits keep beautifully in tins. Anything with fresh cream or fruit should be assembled on the day. A small bowl of strawberries or raspberries, passed at the table, adds a fresh note and gives guests who have eaten their fill of cake something lighter to finish on.

Hosting Etiquette: Order, Refills and Grace

Traditionally, guests work from the bottom tier upwards, though nobody will mind if someone starts with a scone. Pour tea for your guests before yourself, offer milk and lemon without fuss, and keep an eye on empty cups. Stir tea gently back and forth rather than in circles, without clinking the spoon against the china, and rest the spoon on the saucer afterwards.

• Eat sandwiches and cake with your fingers; use a fork only for a substantial slice of cake or a tart.
• Break a scone in half with your hands rather than cutting it, then add cream and jam to each half as you eat.
• Keep the little finger relaxed. Crooking it was once a sign of affectation, not refinement.
• Refill cups without asking permission, but never top up a half-drunk cup.

The finest afternoon teas are the ones where nobody is watching the clock. Set the table well, bake what you can manage with good humour, and let the conversation run on. That, more than any rule of etiquette, is what traditional country hospitality has always been about.